Archive for April, 2008
Answer to the Kilt Question
The guy seated next to the Queen is priceless!
And the picture with the kids is so funny!
If you wait long enough, all questions finally get answered.
The Alligator and the Blonde
A guy walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He puts the alligator up on the bar. He turns to the astonished patrons.
“I’ll make you a deal. I’ll open this alligator’s mouth and place my manhood inside. Then the gator will close his mouth for one minute. Then he’ll open his mouth and I’ll remove my unit unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink.”
The crowd murmured their approval.
The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers, and placed his Johnson and related parts in the alligator’s open mouth. The gator closed his mouth as the crowd gasped. After a minute, The man grabbed a beer bottle and smacked the alligator hard on the top its head. The gator opened its mouth and the man removed his genitals unscathed as promised.
The crowd cheered, and the first of his free drinks were delivered.
The man stood up again and made another offer, “I’ll pay anyone $100 who’s willing to give it a try.”
A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar. A Blonde woman timidly spoke up…
“I’ll try it -Just don’t hit me so hard with the beer bottle!”
Interesting
1. Losing all your friends
Man comes home and finds his wife with his friend in bed.
He shoots his friend and kills him.
Wife says “If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends.”
2. Brother wanted
A small boy wrote to Santa Claus,”send me a brother”…
Santa wrote back, “SEND ME YOUR MOTHER”…
3. Importance of a period
Teacher: “Do you know the importance of a period?”
Kid: “Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got a heart attack & our driver ran away.”
4. Confident vs. confidential
A young boy asks his Dad, “What is the difference between confident and confidential? ”
Dad says, “You are my son, I’m confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, that’s confidential! ”
Signs of spring
I saw the first sign of spring today
Those open toed shoes are a dead giveaway!